Some theaters showing “Melania” were so empty that wags suggested that undocumented immigrants should hide out there. Reviews are brutal: The Independent said the first lady came across as “a preening, scowling void of pure nothingness in this ghastly bit of propaganda.” The Guardian dismissed the movie as “gilded trash,” and Variety asked, “Why would Amazon spend $75 million on a movie this boring?” (I think we all know the answer to that.)