My school friend abhors all visible eyewear, and can’t understand why everyone doesn’t have varifocal contact lenses. Another friend hates it when anyone’s glasses are attached to them by anything, because it means he can’t steal them, which he does constantly; often you can only find them again by following the sound of him shouting: “are these a THREE POINT FIVE?” Another friend won’t wear anything, out of vanity, and has the font so large on his phone that I have accidentally read every text he’s been sent for the past five years, one giant word at a time.