Mind you, even as someone who lacks the bonhomie of your average misanthrope and who is easily irritated by life’s presumptions, I struggle to find too much of a problem with the “save-the-date” email. So while I sympathise with the reader who asks if such communications are overly forward or self-regarding, the problem may be with your approach. (Incidentally, I’m not sure they are self-regarding. Someone who truly believes their events are unmissable would not worry about booking a slot in your diary months ahead.)